Mother’s Day

This is a time I don’t like but I don’t dread it either. Mother’s Day has been pretty hard on me ever since I was in grade school. For those who aren’t adopted you may wonder why this is such a diffcult day for those adopted. I can’t speak for them but I can speak for myself. I feel as my biological mom, who was once in my life at one point was taken away from me. Not forced but by choice. I am not sure what the reason was and may never know as I have mentioned before. It made Mother’s Day hard for me because I had so many unanswered questions about her that came to me. I felt so alone at times like no one truly understand how I felt. On this day I tend to think about what was she like, how is she doing now, does she think about me or regret giving me up, plus way more. I remember one Mother’s Day I think I was in Middle School at the time and I wrote a letter to my biological mom and I sat there in my bedroom in silence for about ten minutes and cried. I was hurt, mad and sad all at once. I eventually gathered myself together and carried on with the rest of the day. As I have gotten older it’s gotten less overwhelming for me but it still stirs up many emotions for me. I tend to shy away from people on this day and want some space to think and collect my thoughts/feelings. Don’t get me wrong, I love my mom who I currently have and I am forever grateful for all she has done for me but there’s always going to be that part of me who feels empty. My biological mom may not be here with me physically to this day since I’m not sure where she is but I always carry her in my heart. ❤️

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